Kirk Hiner prefers music sung in languages he can't understand and believes tomatoes are al qaeda.

He was born on Easter Sunday, once broke up with a girl because her eyelids were too puffy, and can provide on demand the name of Peter Schilling's producer for the Error in the System LP.

When Kirk needs a paycheck, he writes for Appletell.com. The rest of the time, he rewrites Hall and Oates lyrics in the past tense.
  

Jim Jividen is an old, kind man with lots of stories. He enjoys hard candy, hobo poetry, tales of the Dust Bowl and googling "Santorum."

He's flown first class, gotten a lap dance, hit a three run homer, and can spot identify two dozen variants of the suplex. He was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar when he met you. He's done some other stuff. Some legal stuff.

You can read more at his longtime blogs Basically Gherkins and What if Steamboat Beat Hogan?